I found repose from a chaotic marriage with sangat. To walk into a living room full of golden light, where people were resonating heartfelt melodies of Guru Guru Wahe Guru, Guru Ram Das Guru was absolutely blissful.
When Bhai Avtar's Jetha came to town I was blessed to attend his workshop where the Naad of classical Gurbani Kirtan deeply nourished my soul.
One morning, following an evening Kirtan class, I had a vivid spiritual dream in the Amrit Vela of what is to come, which Yogiji confirmed a few days later in his Women's Camp lecture.
I was standing in a large auditorium with many Sikhs and yoga students calmly waiting for Yogiji to arrive when the room began to slowly fill with water. As it rose up to our shoulders we were able to float a bit to keep our heads above water. Then from the rear of the room, when cresting swells arose and moved through the building and washed over us one after the other, I would take a deep breath, dive through a wave and come out on the other side, exhaling and inhaling in preparation for the next. Large waves began to come upon us, each higher than the last. I held my breath and dove through them--until one arose that was as high as the ceiling. Again, I inhaled deeply, held my breath and dove into the face of the wave, but this time relaxed and effortlessly merged with the wave, exhaling and inhaling a sublime substance, becoming one with it. It was subtle and blissful. The amazing thing was, I was awake enough to realize that I was breathing real breaths.
Curious, I went outside to see where the waves were coming from. From the north a huge wave came toward the building that I glided through, breathing easily. When I burst through to the other side of this wave I looked up to see yet another rising along the full length of the horizon and as high as my eyes could see. Such a wave would clear everything in its path. I wasn't sure how to handle this one. Turning to the south, to see where it would take me, I saw two tidal waves in the distance angling toward us from the southeast and southwest, and masses of water swirling into a black hole. At this very moment, my alarm went off and I got up for sadhana, feeling my pajamas, surprised to find I was not wet.
Two days later Yogiji mentioned in his lecture how gigantic, cosmic tidal waves would sweep the earth, and the black hole, which will swallow them up. I wrote Yogiji, mentioning my spiritual dream, and that people will want to know how to go through the Big One. "Will it be as simple? --Deep, conscious breathing, holding the breath, relaxing and merging?"
This is how Yogiji replied:
Date: Mon Sep 30, 2002 01:13:53 PM US/Mountain
To: guruprem@newmexico.com
Subject: YB GRD Response:
Sat Nam. I have gratefully received your email. Be the tidal wave of greatness and devotion. Live in the consciousness of Guru Ram Das. Do a strong and consistent sadhana; move from karma into Dharma. Cut and polish your path into pure steel from which, no matter what happens, your true reality consistently and positively shines.
Energize your psyche and merge with the True Guru; elevate yourself. Steadily march into your cosmic consciousness; hear the unstrung tune, and consistently vibrate with the rhythmic force of Nanak. My love and prayers are with you to shine from your brightest and truest being--your noble self. Hail Guru Ram Das and march to his beautiful beat on the Golden Chain.
Through that spiritual dream, by relaxing and breathing consciously and meditatively becoming receptive to the wave instead of fearing it, I was able to experience the wave's vastness and merge with the Divine. Let us follow Yogiji's guidance and devotedly engaging with cosmic waves, bless the world.
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